


not a great idea buddy

by darknightskye



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: April Fools, Clubbing, M/M, Not Serious, gladio's birthday, iggy and gladio are proud parents, just a shitpost with some thought put into it, legit just a chatfic, noct has a nice ass, prompto has chocobo boxers and he loves them, will kinda follow the story
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-13
Updated: 2017-04-03
Packaged: 2018-10-04 14:41:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,017
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10281194
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darknightskye/pseuds/darknightskye
Summary: Prompto has the "genius" idea of making a chat with the bois.Is it a good idea? Probably not.





	1. fucking noodles

**[PROMPTO ARGENTUM HAS ADDED GLADIOLUS AMICITIA, NOCTIS LUCIS CAELUM, AND IGNIS SCIENTA TO THE GROUP]**

 

 

**[PROMPTO ARGENTUM HAS RE-NAMED THE GROUP TO: b o i s]**

 

 

 

**NOCTIS** : prompto 

 

**NOCTIS** : why

 

**GLADIO** : We're literally with each other all the time

 

**IGNIS** : Precisely.

 

**NOCTIS** : not a great idea buddy

 

**PROMPTO** : come on!!

 

**PROMPTO** : its to have fun!

 

**PROMPTO** : you know

 

**PROMPTO** : like normal people do

 

**NOCTIS** : are you saying i don't know how to have fun

 

**PROMPTO** : you fish all the time.

 

**PROMPTO** : fishings not fun noct.

 

**NOCTIS** : shhhh

 

**PROMPTO** : i'm right dude

 

**PROMPTO** : mom, dad!! back me up!!

 

**GLADIO** : He's right

 

**IGNIS** : And you're not going to question him referring to us as mom and dad? 

 

**GLADIO** : Cause I knew you would bring it up

 

**PROMPTO** : see, such loving parents! :)

 

**NOCTIS** : are we their kids then 

 

**PROMPTO** : you're definitely their kid dude

 

**IGNIS** : Wonderful, a child who refuses to eat his vegetables.

 

**NOCTIS** : isn't that how most kids are though

 

**NOCTIS** : no big deal

 

**GLADIO** : You have to eat them to grow up to be a big strong prince

 

**PROMPTO** : listen to daddy gladdy

 

**GLADIO** : Why

 

**GLADIO** : You had to go and make it weird

 

**IGNIS** : I believe he's been doing that since we met him.

 

**PROMPTO** : )):

 

**PROMPTO** : ouch

 

**NOCTIS** : it was funny

 

**PROMPTO** : !!

 

**PROMPTO** : thanks noct <3

 

**NOCTIS** : <3

 

**GLADIO** : Stop sending hearts 

 

**NOCTIS** : <3 <3 <3

 

**PROMPTO** : <3

 

**IGNIS** : Unruly children.

 

**GLADIO** : Why don't we just leave them here Iggy

 

**PROMPTO** : in the middle of the desert!

 

**PROMPTO** : c r u e l

 

**NOCTIS** : killing your prince

 

**NOCTIS** : heartless

 

**IGNIS** : Hardly the middle of the desert.

 

**GLADIO** : At least we made it to the gas station you babies

 

**NOCTIS** : still have to get the money though 

 

**PROMPTO** : cindy's so sweet guys

 

**PROMPTO** : fixing our car for us

 

**IGNIS** : She's literally doing her job.

 

**PROMPTO** : shhhh

 

**NOCTIS** : stop crushing on girls you won't get

 

**PROMPTO** : d u d e

 

**PROMPTO** : y ou were supposed to be my one supporter 

 

**PROMPTO** : )):

 

**NOCTIS** : fine

 

**NOCTIS** : go after who ever you want

 

**GLADIO** : ^ 

 

**GLADIO** : Have fun kid

 

**PROMPTO** : n i c e 

 

**IGNIS** : Going to go talk to Cindy? 

 

**PROMPTO** : lmao nope

 

**PROMPTO** : got someone else in mind ;)))

 

**PROMPTO** : gotta lay down the ground work tho

 

**NOCTIS** : whatever works

 

**NOCTIS** : now can we please go do these hunts

 

**IGNIS** : We need the money.

 

**GLADIO** : Yeah let's go

 

**PROMPTO** : fun

 

**PROMPTO** : get to run around and kill things  

 

**NOCTIS** : with all 3 of us

 

**NOCTIS** : yw

 

**NOCTIS** : a life changing experience  

 

**GLADIO** : Quit bitching and let's go

 

**NOCTIS** : fine 

  

 

-

  

  
**PROMPTO** : im never gonna be able to walk again

 

**NOCTIS** : your fault for wearing those boots

 

**PROMPTO** : they look nice!!

 

**PROMPTO** : it completes the outfit 

 

**IGNIS** : The key to any outfit is a nice pair of shoes.

 

**PROMPTO** : see!

 

**PROMPTO** : iggy gets it

 

**GLADIO** : Since when were you a fashion expert

 

**IGNIS** : It's hardly complicated to understand.

 

**NOCTIS** : why look nice when you can be comfortable though

 

**PROMPTO** : noct

 

**PROMPTO** : you'd wear sweatpants all day if you could 

 

**PROMPTO** : wouldn't you

 

**NOCTIS** : y e s 

 

**IGNIS** : Disgusting.

 

**NOCTIS** : i didnt come here to be shamed for what id wear

 

**PROMPTO** : i mean

 

**PROMPTO** : youd probably look in anything

 

**PROMPTO** : but sweatpants??

 

**PROMPTO** : just dude 

 

**NOCTIS** : id look good in anything

 

**NOCTIS** : nice

 

**NOCTIS** : im gonna find sweatpants

 

**PROMPTO** : N O C T

 

**PROMPTO** : N O

 

**IGNIS** : For all of our sakes.

 

**GLADIO** : What the hell is even going on anymore

 

 

**[PROMPTO ARGENTUM HAS RE-NAMED THE GROUP TO: noct can't dress right]**

 

 

**NOCTIS** : :(

 

**NOCTIS** : not true

 

**NOCTIS** : look at what im wearing right now

 

**PROMPTO** : you're in your boxers and a shirt

 

**NOCTIS** : shit

 

**IGNIS** : How are you not aware of what you're wearing?

 

**NOCTIS** : im in bed and tired

 

**NOCTIS** : cut me some slack

 

**GLADIO** : You're always tired

 

**PROMPTO** : ^

 

**PROMPTO** : he's not wrong buddy

 

**PROMPTO** : d u d e your boxers are normal and boring

 

**IGNIS** : Why are you looking at his underwear.

 

**PROMPTO** : it's not my fault he basically sticks his ass out when he sleeps!

 

**NOCTIS** : im not sleeping

 

**PROMPTO** : fine

 

**PROMPTO** : then when he's in bed 

 

**NOCTIS** : stop looking at my ass

 

**PROMPTO** : no

 

**NOCTIS** : i will throw a pillow at you blondie

 

**NOCTIS** : t r y me

 

**GLADIO** : He's still looking 

 

**GLADIO** : Also why the hell are we texting if we're next to each other

 

**IGNIS** : You all can continue, but I will be heading to bed. 

 

**IGNIS** : But before I do; Prompto. If his boxers are plain and boring, what do yours look like?

 

**NOCTIS** : 10 gil that they have chocobos on them

 

**PROMPTO** : :')

 

**PROMPTO** : you know me so well noct 

 

**PROMPTO** : <3

 

**NOCTIS** : <3

 

**GLADIO** : Of course you would  

 

**GLADIO** : Now, I think im gonna head to bed too

 

**IGNIS** : You're in bed.

 

**GLADIO** : You know what I mean

 

**PROMPTO** : are mom and dad fighting again 

 

**NOCTIS** : they're my mom and dad

 

**NOCTIS** : you're like

 

**NOCTIS** : the bad boy who tries to woo me

 

**PROMPTO** : bad boy

 

**PROMPTO** : n i c e

 

**GLADIO** : Don't you ruin my child

 

**PROMPTO** : ;))) 

 

**IGNIS** : Will we have to go to extreme measures.

 

**NOCTIS** : not letting me see him will make me want him even more 

 

**PROMPTO** : ;)))))))

 

**GLADIO** : Kids these days

 

**GLADIO** : Back in my day all you needed was a cup of noodles to be happy

 

**NOCTIS** : i didn't know you fucked noodles gladio

  

 

**[GLADIOLUS AMICITIA HAS EXITED noct can't dress right]**

 

 

**NOCTIS** : prompto calm down it wasn't that funny

 

**PROMPTO** : you're laughing too!!

 

**PROMPTO** : hypocrite 

 

**IGNIS** : If you two are quite done, I will try to rest as well.

 

**IGNIS** : Please try to keep noise to a minimum.

 

**NOCTIS** : we'll just stay here then

 

**NOCTIS** : gn specs 

 

**PROMPTO** : sleep tight!!

 

**IGNIS** : Don't stay up too late.

 

**NOCTIS** : yes mom

 

  

**[IGNIS SCIENTA HAS EXITED noct can't dress right]**

 

 

**NOCTIS** : so

 

**NOCTIS** : just us two

 

**PROMPTO** : yeah dude

 

**PROMPTO** : what do you wanna do?

 

**NOCTIS** : first

 

**NOCTIS** : stop staring at my ass

 

**PROMPTO** : it's a nice ass 

 

**PROMPTO** : you're depriving me of a r t dude

 

**PROMPTO** : ):

 

**NOCTIS** : too bad

 

**NOCTIS** : im tired 

 

**PROMPTO** : aw

 

**PROMPTO** : weak

 

**PROMPTO** : we were supposed to have f un 

 

**NOCTIS** : come closer im cold

 

**NOCTIS** : p l e a s e

 

**PROMPTO** : is this all i am to you

 

**PROMPTO** : just w a r m t h

 

**PROMPTO** : im hurt noct

 

**NOCTIS** : prompto ily please w a r m me

 

**PROMPTO** : a wwwwww

 

**PROMPTO** : okay

 

**NOCTIS** : we should sleep anyways, just have to do another hunt and we'll have enough to pick up the regalia

 

**PROMPTO** : sweet

 

**PROMPTO** : i miss the car

 

**NOCTIS** : same 

 

**PROMPTO** : dude do you think that Cindy could paint the car

 

**NOCTIS** : we're not painting the regalia 

 

**PROMPTO** : pink 

 

**PROMPTO** : a pink regalia dude 

 

**PROMPTO** : just think about it 

 

**NOCTIS** : would you really go that far just for a joke

 

**PROMPTO** : yes

 

**NOCTIS** : damn it you were supposed to say no

 

**NOCTIS** : cause now im tempted to

 

**PROMPTO** : o m g

 

**PROMPTO** : dude let's do it 

 

**PROMPTO** : four tough dudes in a pink car

 

**NOCTIS** : let's talk about it in the morning

 

**NOCTIS** : my eyes will barely stay opened 

 

**PROMPTO** : lmao i can tell

 

**PROMPTO** : need me to get closer?

 

**NOCTIS** : yes please im freezing 

 

**PROMPTO** : kay  

 

**[PROMPTO ARGENTUM AND NOCTIS LUCIS CALEM HAVE EXITED noct can't dress right]**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi yes i love shitposting and i love this game  
> so bam  
> hope yall enjoy
> 
> legit just finished the game last night and cried so much  
> so i had to write the boys not suffering
> 
> i mean, there will be suffering later, but hella later  
> just fun for now
> 
> and yes, i have a beautiful [pink car](https://www.dropbox.com/s/2dwps19sk7p7bwk/unnamed.jpg?dl=0) , and a chocobo sticker where prompto sits :')  
> i love him  
> ps he took a pic of noct's ass here ;))
> 
> feel free to leave any prompts or suggestions over at my [tumblr!](http://dark-night-skye.tumblr.com/)
> 
> random updates incoming


	2. knife knife

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompto makes a knife knife 
> 
> Its really just a sword.  
> Don't tell him.

**[PROMPTO ARGENTUM HAS ENTERED noct can't dress right]**

 

 

**PROMPTO** : guys

 

**PROMPTO** : i need to reveal to you all

 

**PROMPTO** : my secret weapon

 

**PROMPTO** : _[IMG_9726]_

 

**PROMPTO** : a knife taped to a knife

 

 

**[NOCTIS LUCIS CALEM AND IGNIS SCIENTA HAVE ENTERED noct can't dress right]**

 

 

**NOCTIS** : knife knife

 

**PROMPTO** : y e s 

 

**IGNIS** : Sword.

 

**PROMPTO** : blocked 

 

**NOCTIS** : reported

 

**IGNIS** : **@GLADIO**

 

**NOCTIS** : don't bring dad into this

 

**PROMPTO** : )):

 

**IGNIS** : It's a sword. 

 

 

**[GLADIOLUS AMICITIA HAS ENTERED noct can't dress right]**

 

 

**GLADIO** : You're both idiots

 

**GLADIO** : It's a sword

 

**PROMPTO** : o k a y

 

**PROMPTO** : but would an idiot make the knife knife

 

**IGNIS** : Yes.

 

**GLADIO** : Yes

 

**NOCTIS** : kinda 

 

**NOCTIS** : maybe 

 

**PROMPTO** : noct don't make me c r y

 

**IGNIS** : What are you going to do.

 

**IGNIS** : Stab him with your sword?

 

**PROMPTO** : knife knife 

 

**PROMPTO** : it's a knife knife 

 

**PROMPTO** : respect my knife knife 

 

**NOCTIS** : i respect your knife knife 

 

**PROMPTO** : b l e s s

 

**PROMPTO** : you get to use the knife knife

 

**NOCTIS** : nice 

 

**IGNIS** : What if it falls apart in the middle of battle?

 

**PROMPTO** : shit

 

**PROMPTO** : um

 

**NOCTIS** : run 

 

**GLADIO** : No

 

**NOCTIS** : yes

 

**IGNIS** : No.

 

**PROMPTO** : h a you got both parents teaming up against you

 

**NOCTIS** : :(

 

**PROMPTO** : :((

 

**NOCTIS** : :(((

 

**PROMPTO** : :((((

 

**GLADIO** : S t o p

 

**NOCTIS** : :(((((

 

**NOCTIS** : wait

 

**NOCTIS** : i have an idea

 

**IGNIS** : And what, pray tell, is it?

 

**NOCTIS** : okay

 

**NOCTIS** : if i can actually use the knife knife in a fight 

 

**NOCTIS** : me and prompto go out by ourselves 

 

**NOCTIS** : for the whole day

 

**PROMPTO** : a bro day

 

**GLADIO** : Isn't everyday technically a bro day

 

**IGNIS** : He has a point.

 

**PROMPTO** : but like

 

**PROMPTO** : this is a special bro day

 

**NOCTIS** : special bro day

 

**PROMPTO** : but legit

 

**PROMPTO** : are we gonna do this

 

**NOCTIS** : yes

 

**IGNIS** : It's a death wish.

 

**NOCTIS** : come on iggy 

 

**NOCTIS** : please

 

**NOCTIS** : either this works

 

**NOCTIS** : or we all die

 

**PROMPTO** : it's a win win

 

**GLADIO** : No dying 

 

**IGNIS** : That'd be preferable.

 

**NOCTIS** : we'll be fine

 

**NOCTIS** : i mean you two will be there in case it goes to shit

 

**PROMPTO** : ^

 

**PROMPTO** : adult supervision 

 

**IGNIS** : You're both adults.

 

**NOCTIS** : not good ones

 

**GLADIO** : True

 

**PROMPTO** : )):

 

**PROMPTO** : how do you even classify good and bad adults wtf 

 

**GLADIO** : Simple

 

**GLADIO** : What time did you stay up until last night 

 

**PROMPTO** : um

 

**NOCTIS** : 3

 

**PROMPTO** : same

 

**GLADIO** : What did you stay up doing

 

**NOCTIS** : is that really a question dude 

 

**GLADIO** : Playing kings knight 

 

**PROMPTO** : and trying to get warm ):

 

**PROMPTO** : it was freezing in that hotel room

 

**NOCTIS** : yeah

 

**IGNIS** : See?

 

**IGNIS** : Bad adults.

 

**PROMPTO** : what makes you guys such great adults tho

 

**GLADIO** : Do I really have to explain

 

**NOCTIS** : i mean

 

**NOCTIS** : not for ignis 

 

**NOCTIS** : i think we all know he's the only responsible one here

 

**PROMPTO** : ^

 

**GLADIO** : Wow

 

**GLADIO** : Am I not responsible either 

 

**IGNIS** : Are you disrespecting your father.

 

**NOCTIS** : maybe 

 

**PROMPTO** : y i k e s

 

**NOCTIS** : no im not

 

**NOCTIS** : you're plenty responsible

 

**NOCTIS** : totally correct

 

**NOCTIS** : me and prompto are bad adults

 

**NOCTIS** : now let's go test the knife knife 

 

 

**[NOCTIS LUCIS CALEM HAS GONE IDLE]**

 

 

**PROMPTO** : oh boy

 

**IGNIS** : As much as I hate to admit it, I'm very curious for the outcome of all this.

 

**GLADIO** : Same

 

**PROMPTO** : let's go see for ourselves bois

 

**GLADIO** : Never call us that again

 

**PROMPTO** : )):

 

**[GLADIOLUS AMICITIA, PROMPTO ARGENTUM, AND IGNIS SCIENTA HAVE GONE IDLE]**

 

 

-

 

 

**[GLADIOLUS AMICITIA, PROMPTO ARGENTUM, NOCTIS LUCIS CALEM, AND IGNIS SCIENTA HAVE RE-ENTERED noct can't dress right]**

 

 

**NOCTIS** : t h e kids win

 

**PROMPTO** : yeah dude!!

 

**PROMPTO** : we rock!!

 

**PROMPTO** : i mean you're the one who actually used it

 

**PROMPTO** : but n i c e 

 

**PROMPTO** : what are we even gonna do

 

**NOCTIS** : idk

 

**GLADIO** : Go clubbing

 

**NOCTIS** : t h e r e are no clubs 

 

**IGNIS** : Why are you encouraging such behavior, Gladio.

 

**GLADIO** : Let the kids be kids??

 

**IGNIS** : Kids do not go "clubbing" 

 

**NOCTIS** : yes they do

 

**PROMPTO** : proven fact dude 

 

**NOCTIS** : if no clubbing

 

**NOCTIS** : what do you wanna do buddy

 

**PROMPTO** : idk

 

**PROMPTO** : maybe just drive around till we find something to do?? 

 

**NOCTIS** : sounds good 

 

**GLADIO** : Don't crash

 

**NOCTIS** : ill be driving don't worry 

 

**PROMPTO** : w o w noct are you calling me a bad driver 

 

**NOCTIS** : yes 

 

**IGNIS** : It's really common knowledge at this point.

 

**PROMPTO** : ):

 

**PROMPTO** : f i n e 

 

**NOCTIS** : what are you guys gonna do while we're gone

 

**GLADIO** : Dunno

 

**GLADIO** : Have anything in mind Iggy?

 

**IGNIS** : Nothing in particular.

 

**GLADIO** : Wait I got it

 

**GLADIO** : You teach me how to cook something 

 

**IGNIS** : You are certainly the most capable to do so.

 

**IGNIS** : I'll teach you.

 

**PROMPTO** : omg :o

 

**PROMPTO** : they're gonna have a date night 

 

**PROMPTO** : cute

 

**GLADIO** : Shut up 

 

**GLADIO** : It's not a date

 

**NOCTIS** : why would you be so defensive if it wasn't a date

 

**PROMPTO** : ^

 

**PROMPTO** : it's totally a date dude 

 

**IGNIS** : Quite a lackluster first date.

 

**IGNIS** : But I'll take it.

 

**PROMPTO** : that's gay

 

**GLADIO** : So are you

 

**PROMPTO** : i mean

 

**PROMPTO** : you're not wrong 

 

**NOCTIS** : common knowledge 

 

**NOCTIS** : again 

 

**PROMPTO** : (':

 

**PROMPTO** : anyways 

 

**PROMPTO** : you two have fun with your date

 

**GLADIO** : Shut up

 

**IGNIS** : We will.

 

**NOCTIS** : hold on

 

**NOCTIS** : where's my jacket

 

**PROMPTO** : (^:

 

**NOCTIS** : are you wearing my jacket

 

**PROMPTO** : maybe 

 

**IGNIS** : Yes he is.

 

**GLADIO** : 100% wearing it

 

**PROMPTO** : w h e r e s the proof

 

**GLADIO** : So you want me to take a picture 

 

**NOCTIS** : please do

 

**PROMPTO** : N O

 

**NOCTIS** : gladio please

 

**NOCTIS** : do it

 

**PROMPTO** : )):

 

**PROMPTO** : time to r u n 

 

**GLADIO** : [[IMG_5286]](https://www.dropbox.com/s/f3115ojg9gdk0pb/prompto.jpg?dl=0)

 

**PROMPTO** : Y O U HAD ME THINKING YOU TOOK AN ACTUAL PICTURE OF ME

 

**PROMPTO** : YOU ASSHOLE

 

**NOCTIS** : pfff 

 

**NOCTIS** : that's pretty funny though

 

**PROMPTO** : )):

 

**PROMPTO** : im tougher than a little chocobo

 

**PROMPTO** : come on it has a normal knife

 

**PROMPTO** : when i, genius extraordinaire prompto argentum created the knife knife 

 

**NOCTIS** : yes 

 

**NOCTIS** : a true genius 

 

**NOCTIS** : now

 

**NOCTIS** : give me my jacket

 

**PROMPTO** : how about i make you a deal

 

**PROMPTO** : ill make you an admin here

 

**PROMPTO** : and you let me wear your jacket just tonight 

 

**NOCTIS** : s h i t

 

**NOCTIS** : fine 

 

**NOCTIS** : but only tonight 

 

**PROMPTO** : nice

 

**PROMPTO** : thanks noct!!

 

**PROMPTO** : <3

 

**NOCTIS** : <3 yw

 

**IGNIS** : Now, be back here by morning.

 

**GLADIO** : If you're not I'll hunt you down Mark my words

 

**NOCTIS** : k

 

**PROMPTO** : back by morning

 

**PROMPTO** : don't you worry

 

**NOCTIS** : you two have fun

 

**GLADIO** : S h u t 

 

**IGNIS** : We will.

 

**GLADIO** : ^

 

 

**[PROMPTO ARGENTUM HAS PROMOTED NOCTIS LUCIS CALEM TO A MODERATOR]**

 

 

**NOCTIS** : nice

 

**NOCTIS** : now

 

**NOCTIS** : later losers 

 

 

**[NOCTIS LUCIS CALEM HAS EXITED noct can't dress right]**

 

 

**PROMPTO** : lmao

 

**PROMPTO** : later guys!!

 

**IGNIS** : Please keep him out of trouble.

 

**PROMPTO** : don't worry iggy 

 

**PROMPTO** : ill keep a close eye on him 

 

**GLADIO** : Make sure to actually have fun tho

 

**PROMPTO** : ik big guy

 

**PROMPTO** : you guys too c:

 

 

**[GLADIOLUS AMICITIA, PROMPTO ARGENTUM, AND IGNIS SCIENTA HAVE EXITED noct can't dress right]**

 

 

**-**

 

 

**[NOCTIS LUCIS CALEM HAS ENTERED noct can't dress right]**

 

 

**NOCTIS** : holy shit guys

 

**NOCTIS** : so we're on our way back now

 

**NOCTIS** : and you two are probably asleep but whatever 

 

**NOCTIS** : even prompto's asleep in the car rn

 

**NOCTIS** : but we had fun

 

**NOCTIS** : actually found a cool place 

 

**NOCTIS** : probably drank too much but whatever 

 

**NOCTIS** : and we got our ears pierced

 

**NOCTIS** : and i know you guys are gonna lose it so just a heads up

 

**NOCTIS** : and it was my idea so don't blame prompto lmao

 

**NOCTIS** : he had a ton of fun

 

**NOCTIS** : so just don't yell at him

 

**NOCTIS** : please? 

 

**NOCTIS** : anyways see you guys in a bit

 

 

**[NOCTIS LUCIS CALEM HAS EXITED noct can't dress right]**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> let the boys go clubbing dude
> 
> and have piercings   
> btw they got their ears pierced  
> and prompto got a cuff on the top of his ear lmao  
> noct just got the two ears, but two holes
> 
> w h o s ready for a lecture from mommy iggy (':
> 
> also i live for prompto wearing noct's jacket  
> just fucking a d o r a b l e 
> 
>  
> 
> feel free to leave any prompts or suggestions over at my [tumblr!](http://dark-night-skye.tumblr.com/)


	3. hike cake and drink

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> what do you mean it's not April first

**[GLADIOLUS AMICITIA HAS ENTERED noct can't dress right]**

 

 

 **GLADIO** : Ear piercings

  
**GLADIO** : You guys should have told me

  
**GLADIO** : Kinda want more

  
**GLADIO** : Plus I forgot to grab my earrings before we left

  
**GLADIO** : Dumb on my part

 

 

**[PROMPTO ARGENTUM HAS ENTERED noct can't dress right]**

 

 

 **PROMPTO** : :00

  
**PROMPTO** : you have piercings??

  
**GLADIO** : My ears

  
**PROMPTO** : nice

  
**PROMPTO** : fuck dude my ears hurt

  
**PROMPTO** : like i unintentionally brush my ear on something

  
**PROMPTO** : then p a i n

  
**GLADIO** : Make sure to keep it clean

  
**PROMPTO** : yup

  
**PROMPTO** : also

  
**PROMPTO** : do you know what today is

  
**PROMPTO** : a p r i l first

  
**GLADIO** : It's the second

  
**PROMPTO** : wait what

  
**PROMPTO** : i swear it's the first

 

 

**[IGNIS SCIENTA HAS ENTERED noct can't dress right]**

 

 

 **IGNIS** : It is the second.

  
**PROMPTO** : I DIDNT GET TO DO MY PRANK

  
**PROMPTO** : W H Y

 

 

**[NOCTIS LUCIS CALEM HAS ENTERED noct can't dress right]**

 

 

 **NOCTIS** : why are you guys already texting it's like

  
**NOCTIS** : 8 in the morning

  
**PROMPTO** : yooo

  
**PROMPTO** : morning sleeping beauty

  
**NOCTIS** : stop

  
**NOCTIS** : april fools

  
**NOCTIS** : i like it

  
**IGNIS** : It is not April 1st.

  
**NOCTIS** : wait

  
**NOCTIS** : for real

  
**GLADIO** : Yeah 

  
**PROMPTO** : probably partied too hard lmao

  
**NOCTIS** : yeah

  
**NOCTIS** : how are your ears

  
**PROMPTO** : fine

  
**PROMPTO** : kinda

  
**NOCTIS** : dude

  
**NOCTIS** : you cried

  
**PROMPTO** : it hurt!!

  
**PROMPTO** : )):

  
**PROMPTO** : why wouldn't i cry

  
**NOCTIS** : cause it wasn't that bad

  
**PROMPTO** : you literally almost fell asleep

  
**PROMPTO** : are you even a human 

 

 **NOCTIS** : yes

  
**NOCTIS** : im a person

  
**IGNIS** : Not a normal one.

  
**NOCTIS** : :(

  
**NOCTIS** : bully

  
**GLADIO** : He's not wrong

  
**PROMPTO** : wait if it's not the first..

  
**PROMPTO** : I TS THE SECOND

  
**NOCTIS** : that's how numbers usually work

  
**PROMPTO** : )):

  
**PROMPTO** : but if it's the second then

  
**PROMPTO** : happy birthday gladio!!

  
**GLADIO** : Thanks

  
**NOCTIS** : birth

  
**NOCTIS** : happy birth

  
**IGNIS** : Is that really all you can say.

  
**PROMPTO** : hes like

  
**PROMPTO** : probably about to fall asleep again

  
**NOCTIS** : (:

  
**GLADIO** : Menacing happy face

  
**PROMPTO** : h o n e s t l y

  
**PROMPTO** : just using :)

  
**PROMPTO** : it's like

  
**PROMPTO** : :) ive seen things i never should have

  
**GLADIO** : But what about :-)

  
**PROMPTO** : the nose makes it better

  
**NOCTIS** : :')

  
**PROMPTO** : that ones fine

  
**NOCTIS** : c:

  
**PROMPTO** : good

  
**NOCTIS** : uwu

  
**PROMPTO** : oh no

  
**PROMPTO** : noct

  
**PROMPTO** : please

  
**NOCTIS** : owo

  
**PROMPTO** : IM GONNA S C R E A M

  
**GLADIO** : We don't use that face

  
**IGNIS** : ^

  
**PROMPTO** : owo is punishable by death

  
**NOCTIS** : too extreme

  
**PROMPTO** : y oure too extreme

  
**NOCTIS** : oof

  
**GLADIO** : Big boy roasts

 

 

**[NOCTIS LUCIS CALEM HAS PINNED THE MESSAGE: Big boy roasts (GLADIOLUS AMICITIA)]**

 

 

 **NOCTIS** : i needed that

  
**NOCTIS** : shit dude im up now cause of that

  
**NOCTIS** : and i just rolled and hurt my ear

  
**NOCTIS** : :)

  
**PROMPTO** : see!!

  
**PROMPTO** : appropriate use of the face

  
**PROMPTO** : like

  
**PROMPTO** : seems happy but just actually wants to die

  
**IGNIS** : Why are we analyzing smiley faces.

  
**GLADIO** : Idk iggy

  
**GLADIO** : Just weird kids

  
**PROMPTO** : !!

  
**PROMPTO** : didn't you two have your date last night

  
**NOCTIS** : oh yeah

  
**NOCTIS** : how did it go ((:

  
**PROMPTO** : using the face again

  
**PROMPTO** : im so proud,,,

  
**GLADIO** : It was fun

  
**PROMPTO** : 00:

  
**PROMPTO** : not denying that it was a date

  
**NOCTIS** : ooooo

  
**NOCTIS** : mommy iggy and daddy gladdy official

 

 

**[PROMPTO ARGENTUM HAS PINNED THE MESSAGE: mommy iggy and gladdy daddy official (NOCTIS LUCIS CALEM)]**

 

 

 **GLADIO** : I don't like both of you

  
**NOCTIS** : :)

  
**PROMPTO** : you love us

  
**GLADIO** : No

  
**NOCTIS** : yes

  
**GLADIO** : Maybe

  
**NOCTIS** : good enough

  
**PROMPTO** : but duuude

  
**PROMPTO** : official

  
**PROMPTO** : yes or no

  
**NOCTIS** : dude

  
**NOCTIS** : you can't just ask like that

  
**PROMPTO** : y o u literally just did tho

  
**NOCTIS** : yeah but

 

 **NOCTIS** : it was a joke

  
**NOCTIS** : not legit

  
**PROMPTO** : ))):

  
**NOCTIS** : wait where did iggy go

  
**PROMPTO** : is he lurking

  
**NOCTIS** : probably

  
**GLADIO** : He's making breakfast

  
**NOCTIS** : s w e e t

  
**PROMPTO** : is he making something special for the birthday boi ;))))

  
**GLADIO** : Can you literally act like a normal person for 5 minutes

  
**NOCTIS** : he can't

  
**PROMPTO** : ))):

  
**GLADIO** : But really he's making my favorite

  
**NOCTIS** : are we really gonna have noodles for breakfast

  
**PROMPTO** : too much dude

  
**GLADIO** : It's normal breakfast food

  
**GLADIO** : Maybe you would know if you two got out of the damn tent

  
**NOCTIS** : no

  
**NOCTIS** : im comfortable

  
**PROMPTO** : wow excuse you

  
**PROMPTO** : im not in the tent

  
**PROMPTO** : i went out early to take pictures!!

  
**NOCTIS** : a nd you didn't take me

  
**NOCTIS** : im offended

  
**PROMPTO** : but dude you were asleep

  
**PROMPTO** : didn't wanna wake you up

  
**NOCTIS** : aw

  
**NOCTIS** : thanks dude

  
**NOCTIS** : <3

  
**PROMPTO** : <3

  
**NOCTIS** : but yo

  
**NOCTIS** : what are we gonna do today

  
**IGNIS** : Why don't we leave it up to Gladio today.

  
**NOCTIS** : yeah

  
**PROMPTO** : i swear if we go on a big hike or something

  
**GLADIO** : :^)

  
**PROMPTO** : p lease no

  
**GLADIO** : We are

  
**PROMPTO** : KNSKSNSKSMSAK

  
**PROMPTO** : my feet are gonna fall off like less than halfway through

  
**IGNIS** : Quite dramatic.

  
**GLADIO** : Come on

  
**GLADIO** : It'll be good

  
**GLADIO** : Build some muscle

  
**PROMPTO** : i have muscle

  
**PROMPTO** : kinda

  
**GLADIO** : You're okay

  
**GLADIO** : Unlike Prince pool noodle

 

 

**[PROMPTO ARGENTUM HAS PINNED THE MESSAGE: Unlike Prince pool noodle (GLADIOLUS AMICITIA)]**

 

 

 **NOCTIS** : :(

  
**NOCTIS** : if that's supposed to be motivation then it's not working

  
**PROMPTO** : bullying = motivation

  
**PROMPTO** : ??

  
**IGNIS** : Apparently.

  
**GLADIO** : It's

  
**GLADIO** : Friendly banter

  
**PROMPTO** : totally

  
**PROMPTO** : "yeah dude you got no muscles go suplex this 87 story building to get strong"

  
**GLADIO** : Builds character

  
**NOCTIS** : 87 stories

  
**NOCTIS** : super achievable

  
**PROMPTO** : obviously

  
**PROMPTO** : yo does anyone have any actually comfortable shoes

  
**PROMPTO** : cause if not ill just die

  
**NOCTIS** : nope

  
**IGNIS** : No.

  
**GLADIO** : Have fun dying

  
**PROMPTO** : )):

  
**NOCTIS** : just walk

  
**NOCTIS** : and if your feet just die

  
**NOCTIS** : ill carry you idc

  
**PROMPTO** : 00:

  
**PROMPTO** : thank you noct!!

  
**GLADIO** : Great

  
**GLADIO** : I get to carry both of you

  
**NOCTIS** : no

  
**GLADIO** : It's gonna happen

  
**PROMPTO** : )):

  
**IGNIS** : What else would you like to do?

  
**GLADIO** : Easy

  
**GLADIO** : Got the whole day planned

  
**PROMPTO** : oh boy

  
**GLADIO** : Hike, eat cake, and drink

  
**NOCTIS** : holy trinity

  
**PROMPTO** : what type of cake

  
**GLADIO** : Ice cream cake

  
**GLADIO** : Obviously the best of all cakes

  
**NOCTIS** : those crunchy things on the side

  
**PROMPTO** : dude

  
**PROMPTO** : those are like heaven on a cake

  
**NOCTIS** : cake heaven

  
**NOCTIS** : and the blue frosting

  
**NOCTIS** : fuck dude it's so good

  
**GLADIO** : Don't nut on my cake dude

  
**PROMPTO** : n u t

  
**GLADIO** : No

  
**NOCTIS** : ;))

  
**NOCTIS** : im too tired to nut

  
**PROMPTO** : what a surprise

  
**IGNIS** : Truly didn't see it coming.

  
**NOCTIS** : nut free zone

  
**NOCTIS** : no nut

  
**PROMPTO** : so we got 2 rules

  
**PROMPTO** : owo is punishable by death

  
**PROMPTO** : and no nutting

  
**GLADIO** : Wow

  
**GLADIO** : No fun zone

  
**NOCTIS** : n o

  
**NOCTIS** : it's fun

  
**NOCTIS** : just keep it calm

  
**NOCTIS** : for the children

  
**PROMPTO** : my pure eyes

  
**NOCTIS** : think of us

  
**IGNIS** : "Pure eyes"

  
**IGNIS** : Lies.

  
**PROMPTO** : (':

  
**GLADIO** : I mean

  
**GLADIO** : He's probably the softest out of all of us

  
**PROMPTO** : im gonna take that as a compliment

  
**NOCTIS** : yes

  
**NOCTIS** : our sweet soft boi

  
**PROMPTO** : c:

  
**PROMPTO** : official decree to never say boy again

  
**PROMPTO** : only boi

  
**IGNIS** : No.

  
**GLADIO** : No

  
**NOCTIS** : yes

  
**NOCTIS** : wow you guys suck

  
**NOCTIS** : smh

  
**NOCTIS** : can't we just meme here

  
**GLADIO** : Too many memes

  
**IGNIS** : ^

  
**IGNIS** : I agree.

  
**PROMPTO** : but that was kinda the point of this place

  
**NOCTIS** : prompto

  
**NOCTIS** : ill always be grateful that you made this little slice of meme hell

  
**NOCTIS** : t h a n k you

  
**PROMPTO** : awww

  
**PROMPTO** : np dude

  
**PROMPTO** : lmao we can always have fun here

  
**PROMPTO** : plus it would come in handy if we all like get separated or something

  
**IGNIS** : I hope that day does not come.

  
**GLADIO** : Same

  
**NOCTIS** : yeah

  
**PROMPTO** : but we'll always have these memories here

  
**PROMPTO** : no matter what!!

  
**NOCTIS** : yup

  
**NOCTIS** : always nice to remember fun things

  
**NOCTIS** : lmao imagine old us coming here

  
**NOCTIS** : "what the fuck is an owo"

  
**PROMPTO** : leaked message of iggy in 10 years

  
**GLADIO** : Guys it's like almost 10

  
**GLADIO** : Let's eat and move out

  
**IGNIS** : I'll go finish breakfast.

  
**GLADIO** : I'll help you set up everything

  
**IGNIS** : Thank you.

 

 

**[GLADIOLUS AMICITIA AND IGNIS SCIENTIA HAVE EXITED noct can't dress right]**

 

 

 **PROMPTO** : yeah im close to getting back to camp

  
**NOCTIS** : nice

  
**NOCTIS** : can't wait to see the pics

  
**PROMPTO** : dude i got some nice ones

  
**NOCTIS** : n i c e

  
**NOCTIS** : honestly i really like how you've been keeping track of everything with the pictures

  
**PROMPTO** : !!

  
**PROMPTO** : thanks dude!!

  
**PROMPTO** : nice to keep the memories

  
**PROMPTO** : like with this place lmao

  
**PROMPTO** : guess im just a super sentimental dude

  
**NOCTIS** : yeah

  
**NOCTIS** : itll be nice to look back on all this one day

  
**PROMPTO** : together tho

  
**PROMPTO** : right?

  
**PROMPTO** : shit that sounded creepy

  
**NOCTIS** : dude how's that even a question

  
**NOCTIS** : of course together

  
**PROMPTO** : :')

  
**NOCTIS** : wouldn't have it any other way

  
**NOCTIS** : you're my best boi dude

  
**PROMPTO** : a w w w

  
**PROMPTO** : <33

  
**PROMPTO** : really dude

  
**PROMPTO** : thanks for being the best friend ive ever had

  
**NOCTIS** : p r o m p t o

  
**NOCTIS** : you don't have to thank me for that

  
**PROMPTO** : lmao if you say so

  
**PROMPTO** : im almost there, so ill see you in a bit dude!!

  
**NOCTIS** : k

  
**NOCTIS** : im gonna get dressed then

  
**NOCTIS** : later

  
**PROMPTO** : byeee

 

 

**[PROMPTO ARGENTUM AND NOCTIS LUCIS CALEM HAVE EXITED noct can't dress right]**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> legit went to a birthday party today lmao  
> and had ice cream cake
> 
>  
> 
> but y o i completely forgot it was his birthday till this morning  
> so worked on this real quick
> 
> and i was kinda in between doing an April fools chapter or not
> 
> so enjoy  
> semi april fools + gladio's birthday 
> 
> now go suplex an 87 story building dude 
> 
>  
> 
> also the end of the chapter ((:  
> boy do i love to suffer


End file.
